Ever wonder why some people never reach their dreams while others seem to scoot right into the cloud of perfect lives, completely covered by pride of their personal ambitions fulfilled? Well, here’s a story that may provide some answers.

 

Two decades ago, my husband and I moved from the bustling city of New Orleans out to two acres of the peaceful and the quiet Picayune, Mississippi offered. I had retired from teaching school and my husband had just a few more years of work at a TV station in the city to complete; so, the timing seemed to be spot on. You know what people say: “Timing is everything!” It may not encompass everything, but it does provide some help in understanding life’s purpose and destiny.

 

After moving to a place where ambulances, house and car alarms, pedestrians with boom boxes, and constant violence no longer incessantly brought interference with thoughts and creative outlets, I knew I had found my place. My mom said, “Grace, here you can think and write undisturbed.” She loved our new location and named it “Beau Sejour”, French for beautiful stay.

 

I immediately discovered gardening and found that the delights of seeing even one plant produce after loving care brought satisfaction and beauty into my life. I began to write. My purpose was to unlock many ideas that had been secreted deep inside but could be uncovered by the discipline of taking pen to paper or merely sitting at the computer to allow thoughts to flow. While teaching school did bring a sense of achievement when students responded and demonstrated results on yearly testing, the garden provided elements that didn’t balk, speak back, or show disrespect for the hard work providing the right environment for them. Instead, they smiled while opening their beauty fully and casting their scent of gratitude to any and all who took time to stop and bend towards them to be engulfed by their glory.

 

My first article published came packaged inside Mississippi magazine. I sent in an article on gardening on our new property and it was accepted. How thrilling it was to see it in print and to see my byline! Yes, I was proud! I was pleased! I had been watching the Oprah Show in the afternoons after coming home from teaching school and knew her show opened new areas of thought, especially for women. I decided to write a response to her and sat down to do so. When I sent it in, I carefully read their advice. “Do not expect a response. We get over 64,000 e-mails a day and cannot return comments.” I thought, “Great!” I was not looking for a response. I merely wanted to comment on the parts of the show that helped me shift my mind from the difficulties of dealing with students and their parents.

 

Two weeks later, the phone rang at 8 PM. My husband answered and called me, “Grace, it’s for you. It’s the Oprah Show!” WHAT?! I thought they said they would not respond! I took the phone and tried to talk. This was NOT what I wanted. The woman said they had read my e-mail and liked what I said. She asked if I would like to say more about the topic they were exploring for the show. “Having courage to make a drastic life change.” I held the phone and prayed. “Dear God, please don’t ask me to do this!” I was not ready to be in the spotlight talking with Oprah. I tried to remember what I had written and nothing came to me. Yes, I had moved from a noisy environment to a quiet one, an escape for my soul, but how would that seem interesting to millions who watched the program? I came up with a few stutters and mild responses. When she said, “We may call you back,” I knew in my heart that they would not. Surely they could find another person with a more exciting story to tell. I put the phone away, my hand shaking.

 

Why hadn’t I written and published a best seller? Why hadn’t I connected with life changing events in my life after the move? Why wasn’t I an example of dreams come true? I knew. I had not pursued intensely. I had not exhibited passion for goals. I was content with being in the background. I liked not being seen. I liked sitting on my back patio swinging and allowing life to offer its silence. I liked watching birds landing and taking off, finding bits of a meal in the grass, and watching leaves fall from trees. All of this was new to me, and I absorbed the wonders and the countryside that brought peace.

 

Why hadn’t the dreams of producing been fulfilled for me? I had not really pursued them. I walked through doors that opened like electric ones in large shopping centers. I had not knocked on any and had certainly not pushed any open. Here is where I wanted to be. Especially now. Was it too late to change the game of my life? I wondered. If timing was everything, had I missed my timing? Did I have the courage to face crowds who might want autographs for something I had written that had made an enormous difference in their lives? Could I? I had not had the courage to face the Oprah Show’s staff. I had not wanted her staff to choose me or even suggest I had something worthwhile to share. The thoughts were overwhelming. Maybe. I sat and listened to my thoughts and kept on swinging.